Our New Reality: Learning about the Autism Spectrum

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Raising kids is not easy, whether you have one, two, four, or six. I think most people would agree with that statement. My daughter is only three, but for a year or two, I’ve compared her to other kids her age when we are in social settings. I know this is something as a parent you are always told not to do, but sometimes it is just inevitable. I love my daughter so much and am often in awe of her kindness and intelligence, but there always seemed to be something a little different about her that I couldn’t quite figure out.

Over the summer I was on Facebook, and stumbled on an article, called “From Discovery to Diagnosis: How I Learned Both of My Children Had Autism”.  I read the author’s description of her daughter who has HFA (High Functioning Autism, previously called Asperger’s), and a lightbulb just went off in my head, it sounded just like Izzie. I shared it with my husband, and we talked about it and agreed for the time being not to do anything, but to keep an eye on her. I won’t go too in-depth, but she has very repetitive behaviors and language. She is frequently humming and having other ticks to self-soothe. She is not social with other children, even ignoring children who try to engage her, and she has additional other behaviors, all of which triggered our concerns.

This fall she started preschool, and it was her first experience in a social setting without a parent/grandparent around. It was a struggle for her to get used to, but now she actually likes going, which is a huge positive. However, for whatever reason, probably her being out of her comfort zone, her HFA type mannerisms were getting worse. We waited until her parent/teacher conference and were greeted by her (awesome) teacher who was very nervous to tell us she thought our daughter needs to be assessed. She was careful not to diagnose, and she mainly used the word “hyper-focused”, but I will tell you she was extremely relieved that my husband and I were not surprised and were actually going to be inquiring about this if she didn’t bring it up.

We are now working with the Sylvania school system and a developmental pediatrician and learning about our new reality. For the foreseeable future, we are not looking to get an official diagnosis since she is only in preschool, but instead, she’ll be classified as having a developmental disability. As far as an unofficial “diagnosis”, we all believe she potentially falls on the high-end of the spectrum, as well as potentially having ADHD. Hearing that extra bit about ADHD for the first time was enlightening, a good explanation (and great excuse) for why I’m always chugging coffee to try to keep up with my adorable rambunctious kiddo.

Just like all families, we have good days and bad, and often both in the same day. Some days are good, I’m just in awe of how intelligent my daughter is, and the things her little brain comes up with. Some days I can’t think and have my patience tested because I struggle to put up with the repetitiveness and humming and other behaviors that are perfectly normal for what we are dealing with.

I’m choosing to write about this because for me writing is a great outlet. I think that talking and sharing about this topic is something I/others probably don’t do enough of. In fact, when I share this article, it will probably be the first time a lot of our friends and family hear about this. My hopes are not only to share about this but also to hopefully meet and talk with others going through the same thing.

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Lindsey Kosik
Lindsey has spent all of her life in Northwest Ohio and currently resides in Sylvania with her husband, Jordan, her 4-year-old daughter, Izzie, and their two dogs, Frankie and Charlie. Lindsey currently works part-time as a website admin and SEO analyst. You will find Lindsey and her family at Disney World multiple times a year as vacation club members and annual pass holders. It is safe to say the whole family is a little obsessed with House Mouse! Besides going to Disney, her favorite things include reading (mostly chick lit and suspense/legal thrillers), finding and sharing great deals she finds and enjoying a nice glass of red wine with some mindless reality tv.

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